"You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart. You’re heading for a breakdown, better pull yourself apart. " - John Cooper Clarke

Pathetically miserable for no reason at all.

On Saturday, Coralie leaves this country to work in a hotel in Tenerife for 4 months as part of her degree in tourism.  I was jumping for joy at one point – the stroppy little cow will give me some relief for a while, but somehow, as a parent  wishing your offspring to leave the nest as soon as possible, the joy is short-lived.  Especially as Coralie is at her dad’s this week and won’t be home on Friday as there is some sort of a farewell party with her friends.

Coralie’s plane is at 1pm.  Neither her father nor her mother are allowed at the airport (Charleroi), and she insists that her sister, Tatiana, drives her there along with Coralie’s boyfriend, her best friend and someone else.  My first-born (of the twins) is about to start leaving the nest, and that saddens me greatly,  far more so than I thought it would.  Four months is nothing.  I’ll be glad to have the house back without her nicking our clothes, my hair-dryer, make-up remover, etc.

And yet I will be sad to see her go, and it will no doubt affect her sister even more so.  I wonder what she will be like when she returns, apart from shockingly tanned.

Oh hell, it’s not as if she’s off for a sex-change.


  1. Posted Wednesday, January 20, 2010 at 11:35 am | Permalink

    It’s very odd when they start flying the nest ……… I can assure you that you’ll come to terms with it remarkably quickly ……..

  2. Posted Wednesday, January 20, 2010 at 12:09 pm | Permalink

    … that you know of.

  3. Posted Wednesday, January 20, 2010 at 12:24 pm | Permalink

    Tenerife? Sex change capital of the Northern Hemisphere? THAT Tenerife?

  4. Posted Wednesday, January 20, 2010 at 12:49 pm | Permalink

    I think the feeling is best described as “bittersweet”. It was gutting when Gddik Jr. went off to university, but you do get used to having the extra freedoms that their departure brings, and it’s a shock when/if they come back again and reclaim their space. But they’re growing up, and ultimately, their independence as new adults is something to rejoice in.

  5. Posted Wednesday, January 20, 2010 at 1:53 pm | Permalink

    You will be amazed at how quickly you’ll get used to her being away. it’s a triumpth to your role as a mother that she’s happy to go and not clinging to your apron strings (I don’t wear an apron either.

    I would hope that should the occasion of a sex change operation arise that you would support in that too.

  6. Posted Wednesday, January 20, 2010 at 6:00 pm | Permalink

    Of course I’d support any child of mine going through a sex change, but of the three, it would never be Coralie:-)

  7. Posted Thursday, January 21, 2010 at 7:38 am | Permalink

    Hi Zoe,

    Regina here, for ExpatWomen.com.

    I would like to personally invite you to list your blog on our Expat Women Blog Directory (www.expatwomen.com/expatblog/) so that other women can read about and learn from your expat experiences.

    Many thanks in advance for your contribution and keep up your great blog!


  8. Posted Thursday, January 21, 2010 at 9:19 am | Permalink

    If it will make you feel better, I’ll gladly come over to your house from time to time to nick your clothes, your hair-dryer and your make-up remover.

  9. Posted Thursday, January 21, 2010 at 3:21 pm | Permalink

    You’re not ‘miserable for no reason.’ Your child is leaving the nest. A mother needs time to assimilate this.

  10. Posted Thursday, January 21, 2010 at 11:34 pm | Permalink

    Perhaps she will come back and surprise you. And you might send your son over for a visit (and an appointment)

One Trackback

  1. By Linkblog » My Boyfriend is a twat on Wednesday, January 20, 2010 at 6:09 pm

    […] “Pathetically miserable for no reason at all.” – Why is there no reason? I think the pure existance of twats alone are miserable enough. The world would run so much smoother without them. But this is not about twats but about a mother who has to let her daughter leave the house. It’s just for four months this time but this is only the first step. Once they smelled the sweetness of freedom they will return to home less and less. And for the parents it’s a hard experience always. For at least 17 years they wished for this day soon to come and when it comes they realize that they did never really want it to come. And they can not fight against it because they know that it is the best for their little loved ones and they would do them no good to keep them home any longer. […]