"You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart. You’re heading for a breakdown, better pull yourself apart. " - John Cooper Clarke
I enjoy spending the good part of an hour washing moisturising cream off toilet doors and the surrounding area. It’s very therapeutic especially when you have to try, unsuccessfully, to get half of the stuff out of the key hole.
This is Todd’s latest temper tantrum – he threw it at the door from the bathroom because I wouldn’t give him €10 to pay back a friend.
The loo does, at least, smell nice now.
Best European Blog For Three Years Running -
Bloggies 2005, 2006 and 2007
Tell me I'm gorgeous. All you need to know about me, and more, if you ask.
About the Blog
This blog is mainly rants about my household, which has been described by a friend as a mixture of 'The Osbournes', 'Absolutely Fabulous' and 'My Family'.
People who have said this weren't smiling. Let's face it, it's bleeding obvious.
The household is made up of myself, Zoe, an oasis of calm, Coralie, a 21 year-old stroppy little cow, her twin sister, Tatiana, who bosses the Twat and me around and winds up their brother Todd, a seventeen-year old with the attention span of a goldfish.
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PictureNose - Current movie reviews, movie news and movie gossip.
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Non Twats
3limes -
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Anji Patchwork -
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Jonny B's private secret diary -
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A Canuck. With a chainsaw.
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It Always Rains in Wales -
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life with the Twat !
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A lovely little blog all the way from the West East Coast.
Watski's World -
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T-Shirt Humor
The only T-Shirts that I'd ever buy are from T-Shirt Humor
Thanks To...
FeedBlitz - for the email update service.
Bravenet - for the guest map.
Andy - for being such a twat as to set all this up for me.
AND
Andy Hopkins for hosting and helping hugely to set this up.
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18 Comments
the boy’s got good aim, you have to give him that. What are the odds against getting all that moisturising cream into the keyhole?
I guess the anger management classes didn’t work. Maybe he should look into a career as a baseball pitcher or cricket bowler?
Looks like seagull crap!
Hope you slapped him!!
I hope he learnt that even though the cream went everywhere he still didn’t get €10
No Anji – he just left and didn’t come back until 6 the next morning.
your son has moisturising cream ?
change the locks while he’s out – that’ll teach him
Direct him to his new sleeping area in the shed
i could say something smartass about moisturiizing, cream and wood…but I won’t.
oh, and then there’s sticking things in keyholes….
I’ve only just noticed that the piece of metal holding the handle and keyhole is dented…. Now that makes 2 doors that that boy has ruined.
How old is he really? Three?
Are you counting the days until you can change the locks?
He should have been cleaning it up himself. And if he refused, swap the door with his. Withdraw labour. Do not meet aggression with aggression. This will sort itself out, but it will take time.
Audrey – he’d left the house before I even saw the mess. I was, admittedly, scared that he would come home as I was alone so I called his father’s mother and explained. She took it up from there although the story he told her was quite, quite different. Obviously.
Wretched boy!
I absolutely agree with Bart on this one. Any chance you can tell him he’s behaving like a three year old when he does things like that?
If he was mine I would sell him on the Slave Market, or swap him for a can of Fosters.
You should’ve used his underpants [fresh, clean ones] to wipe it off…the insides of the underpants…so when he wears ’em…
It must’ve been scary for you.
Damn teenagers……there should to be a special place for them all to be locked up until the age of 20…not saying they get better….don’t want to give you any false hope :/
Maybe it’s time for you and the Twat to move to Twatislavia or the ancestral McCarthy family estate and pool hall. Just don’t tell Todd.